Friday, August 06, 2004
  The platform
If Kerry becomes President, these will be his policies as I understand them (this is a result of perusing the campaign website):

Foreign Policy: Bend over. This will result in the International Community liking us again. By "International Community" we mean: France, Germany, Russia, the Arab street and the United Nations. Islamists will leave Americans alone if we'd just stop stoking their Jihadist Anger.

Iraq: Ditto Foreign Policy above. Get behind Lakhdar "Israel is poison" Brahimi to solve the Middle East crisis that is fueling violence in Iraq.

National Defense: Pump up First Responders. It's okay if we get hit, as long as cities are funded to put out the resulting fires, clean up the resulting mess, and offer hospital beds to the resulting victims. On Larry King Live last month, Mr. Kerry told Americans that he didn't have time for a White House briefing on the new terrorism threat:

Let's get to, first thing's first, news of the day. Tom Ridge warned today about al Qaeda plans of a large-scale attack on the United States, didn't increase the -- do you see any politics in this? What's your reaction?

KERRY: Well, I haven't been briefed yet, Larry. They have offered to brief me; I just haven't had time. But all Americans are united in our efforts to defeat terrorism.

But he had time to attend a Bush Bash celebrity fundraiser in New York. Will anybody ponder his priorities?

Economic Policy: Class warfare. There are two Americas: the "haves" and the "have nots". Tax the Haves more, so the Have Nots get more. This means my family tax rate will increase, but I should rest assured it's okay-- it's for the Common Good. I wonder if he plans to close the loopholes that his lovely wife has been able to leverage. Oops, I digress. Even though the tax cuts are contributing to the Greatest Deficits in the History of America, the revenue generated from Rich Americans (such as myself, apparently) will be redirected to other programs, such as:

Healthcare: Everybody in America has the inalienable right to mediocre healthcare provided by the government. It says so in the Constitution (when I find the passage, I'll post). The rich will pay for this, because they have an obligation, as Rich Americans, to provide for the Common Good. Why do Rich Foreigners come to America for specialized healthcare, I wonder? Ah, it doesn't matter, really. Middle America can't afford healthcare, so the rich can foot the bill. It's only fair.

Education: Throw more federal money at it. Prisons are holding education back, so he will stop building prisons and put that money into education instead. Still not sure how more federal money will help education. I'd like to hear of a plan at the local level that addresses the problem of mismanagement of our education dollars. I don't need to hear the Senators tell me it's a Federal issue. It's not. (For honesty's sake: abolish the No Child Left Behind initiative, please!) Next.

Integrity: He will never mislead or lie to us. He will fight for the common man (not sure who that is, but if he insists.) I know I've forgotten something.... oh, did you know he was born in the West Wing? I kid you not!

Overall, I'm amazed at how much President Kerry will be able to fund with the tax rollbacks for the rich. I've heard on one occasion that "rich" is an income of $200k or more. Apparently Mr. Kerry doesn't visit California often, or even his beloved Boston.

I have a morbid curiosity of a Kerry presidency. This will be an interesting campaign season, indeed.

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